Message of hope - please read!

For the in-betweenies, fingers crossed everybody!!

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Queserasera
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Feb 13, 2016 6:46 pm

Message of hope - please read!

#1 Post by Queserasera » Thu Feb 08, 2018 4:57 pm

I rarely post on these forums but I thought this might be good for people to read. My husband and I have been trying to conceive since 25 years old (we're 32 now) and doing IVF since 28 years old. I think we've done 5 rounds but I lose track! We had one pregnancy that looked like it was going to carry to term - we had the 7 week scan and were told there was a 94% chance of carrying to term but we must have been in the 6%. Somewhere along the way we adopted two boys but really wanted to try one last time. We went for donor eggs and she was born last week! Apart from the horrible, horrible baby blues, she's so precious.

However, there were a lot of times along the way where we thought things were looking bad and so I thought I'd document what you might think is a negative sign but really doesn't need to be:

1. Of our 7 embryos, only 2 embryos were suitable for transfer or freezing, which I felt was a bad sign. I was wrong.
2. I got cramping 2 days before my period was due (7dp5dt), which fitted with previous failed attempts/periods.
3. The day after the cramping, I had red blood with a clot when I wiped - this was the day before my period was due (8dp5dt). This is how my period normally starts and how I've known previous attempts have failed.
3. The day my period was due, it didn't turn up but I still didn't think it was anything because the drugs could have delayed it, as I think they had done once before.

I then had a positive test then (unbelievable!) but knew that I needed to get to the scan date. After the positive test:

4. I bled, sometimes quite heavily and with bright red blood for 9 days of the 16 following days before the scan (and then more after the scan, but less and it gradually tapered off). It was sometimes bright red and sometimes brown and stringy and I got cramping and backache too.
5. I had further scares at 10w and 14w.

Throughout the two week wait (and thereafter), I had barely any symptoms at all. I didn't get any sore boobs until the day before OTD and even then, they just felt like period boobs and went away quickly. There was no bloating, no thirst, no sickness and I lost weight. I didn't urinate more and I had occasional brown spotting on my finger when inserting pessaries, which was stringy and dark brown. All that maybe changed was that I was slightly more sensitive to noise and I slept more the first week (but that could have been psychological because when I thought my period was coming and it was all over, I started staying up later again!).

All you people who are waiting or trying or losing hope, have faith! It can happen, with barely any obvious signs and with lots of negative signs. One of the counsellors once told me that if the people who persevere, they almost all end up with what they want. Persevering is sometimes the hardest thing to do but stick with it and have faith.

Hangerl
Posts: 15
Joined: Sun Mar 17, 2019 12:45 am

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#2 Post by Hangerl » Sun Jun 09, 2019 10:53 pm

Hi

I know this post was put up a while ago and not sure if your still on here but I would just like to say thank you. I am so happy for you and hope your little girl is doing well. This has given me hope after a devastating weekend. I found out I was pregnant a week ago and last night after some cramping I started bleeding with clots. It seems to have stopped now but still need to wait for my scan in a few weeks to confirm either way. My heart of hearts tells me I have had yet another miscarriage and I am truly heartbroken and feel so alone. After reading this I am trying to stay positive.

Thank you
Lisa x

Queserasera
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Feb 13, 2016 6:46 pm

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#3 Post by Queserasera » Sun Jun 09, 2019 11:12 pm

It is so hard and such a horrible journey sometimes. I'll be thinking of you and I hope you find out quickly, either way. I had a missed miscarriage the time before this pregnancy and although it is a horrendous thing to go through, it DOES get better and you DO feel happy again. Whatever the outcome, you will be OK and life will keep going. The first couple of days were heart wrenching but after that, I was able to start planning and thinking and smiling a bit more and the pain passes. If it's good news, put a post up if you can!

MommyKenny
Posts: 37
Joined: Mon Jul 01, 2019 9:36 am

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#4 Post by MommyKenny » Tue Aug 06, 2019 7:00 am

Thank you for reviving this post ladies. I'm on my two week wait now and any form of positive message is a great help! I know we are supposed to keep things normal on this period but I just can't stop thinking about it and I get scared all the time. But I do know about keeping the faith. I had more than one too many fails in the past but we just keep going. This is the first time we had egg and sperm donation so we really hope this works this time.

Queserasera
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Feb 13, 2016 6:46 pm

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#5 Post by Queserasera » Tue Aug 06, 2019 7:08 am

Good luck... It's very hard but as always, time passes (slowly) xx

Queserasera
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Feb 13, 2016 6:46 pm

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#6 Post by Queserasera » Tue Aug 06, 2019 7:09 am

Hangerl wrote:
Sun Jun 09, 2019 10:53 pm
Hi

I know this post was put up a while ago and not sure if your still on here but I would just like to say thank you. I am so happy for you and hope your little girl is doing well. This has given me hope after a devastating weekend. I found out I was pregnant a week ago and last night after some cramping I started bleeding with clots. It seems to have stopped now but still need to wait for my scan in a few weeks to confirm either way. My heart of hearts tells me I have had yet another miscarriage and I am truly heartbroken and feel so alone. After reading this I am trying to stay positive.

Thank you
Lisa x
How did you get on, Lisa?

Hangerl
Posts: 15
Joined: Sun Mar 17, 2019 12:45 am

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#7 Post by Hangerl » Sat Aug 10, 2019 7:29 pm

Hi
I went to clinic for an early scan and everything was fine, no sign of bleeding. A few days latter the cramping and bleeding started again and I had a miscarriage at 7 weeks. As you can imagine we were absolutely devastated. That was back in June. We are taking it a day at a time and when we are ready we will start again with our frozen embryos. We had an appointment at Clinic the other day and discussed the changes for the next attempt which include steroids and blood thinning injections.

Thank you for thinking of me and sorry it has taken me a while to respond, I've only just logged back in after the miscarriage.

Lisa x

MommyKenny
Posts: 37
Joined: Mon Jul 01, 2019 9:36 am

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#8 Post by MommyKenny » Tue Aug 13, 2019 8:11 am

Hello Lisa, I am so sorry dear. Please hang on there. It's a good thing you still have those embryos frozen. I have a couple frozen too. So yeah, we just keep going.

Queserasera
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Feb 13, 2016 6:46 pm

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#9 Post by Queserasera » Tue Aug 13, 2019 8:47 am

I am so sorry too. It hurts so much, I know. Keep going, day by day xxx

Hangerl
Posts: 15
Joined: Sun Mar 17, 2019 12:45 am

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#10 Post by Hangerl » Tue Aug 13, 2019 3:12 pm

Thanks Ladies

It’s getting easier as the days go by and trying to stay focused on the end goal. We are going again in September with some changes so just counting down the days while at the same time completely petrified it will happen again- do t know if I can go through another MC.

Hope all is well with you ladies.

Lisa x

MommyKenny
Posts: 37
Joined: Mon Jul 01, 2019 9:36 am

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#11 Post by MommyKenny » Wed Aug 14, 2019 9:12 am

Do you have someone you can talk to back there dear? It is important you don't bottle things in.

Hangerl
Posts: 15
Joined: Sun Mar 17, 2019 12:45 am

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#12 Post by Hangerl » Fri Aug 16, 2019 8:27 am

Hi
Yes I have a very supportive family and am talking things through. Interestingly my first instinct in tough situations is to bottle things up but since the IVF journey began i’ve Been talking. Mental health is yet as important and will help get that positive outcome I’m after.

Lisa x

MommyKenny
Posts: 37
Joined: Mon Jul 01, 2019 9:36 am

Re: Message of hope - please read!

#13 Post by MommyKenny » Tue Aug 20, 2019 6:53 am

Oh that's good. I hope your clinic is just where your hometown is. Mine might prove a bit difficult as my clinic is outside Europe.

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