January 2025

[Nevergiveup]

Lorelai how are you doing? Has the bleeding settled down? I’ve been thinking about you x

[AmericanGirl]

Nevergiveup, yes I’ve been at Care Nottingham. Which doctor do you see? Seema is our primary but we’ve seen loads at different times.

[Nevergiveup]

Rachel we see Krishna, she’s nice. I did have other drs do transfers earlier on if she was off or not scheduled to do them but due to complications with every transfer from my uterus tilting backwards and scar tissue in my cervix due to a huge tear during delivery of my first and a c section scar with my second she has requested that she does all transfers now. Sometimes there was like 20 attempts to get the catheter in and they had to use a different type and one dr bent the tip to get it in but then it got stuck and wouldn’t come out. So Krishna has said she wants to do everything and she seems good. I’ve not had any issues since she has been doing everything other than it not working but that’s not her fault it’s all just a luck game

[Lorelai]

Hi,

Unfortunately, but as expected, my test was negative on Monday so this round was not successful for me. I am feeling ok, I think that bleeding last week eased me in to accepting the negative result. We have our review call on Monday to discuss next steps. Wondering how quickly we can try again?

How is everyone else doing?

xx

[AmericanGirl]

Lorelei, I am so sorry to hear that. We are in the same boat with you right now, so please vent as much as you want. Have you called to make a review appointment with your consultant? That’s usually a few weeks away. My consultant usually wants me to start with the 3rd bleed after a failed attempt (or later is fine too) - she said the bleed right after the negative test isn’t a true period, then you have a normal period and don’t do anything, then you can start with the next period. So that’s roughly 2 months from the negative test. I’m not sure if all doctors are the same. How are you feeling?

Nevergiveup, I’m not sure if I’ve ever met her. My 3rd transfer was a woman who I can’t remember her name, so it could have been her. I’ve had a different doctor for each retrieval and transfer.

Honestly guys, I am not doing well. I’m not sure if ive mentioned but my mother in law has a brain tumor and she’s been going downhill quickly recently. Since last week she can’t even stand on her own, and the oncologist says she has weeks left. So im having to come to terms with the fact that she won’t ever meet my children, and cope with loosing her in general, and cope with the most recent negative test, and my husband is sleeping there most nights to help so I’m having to do it all on my own. I’m really struggling and my anxiety has flared up pretty bad. I made an appointment with the GP about it actually. I’ve never tried anti-anxiety meds and I know some you can’t take during pregnancy but I think there are some you can and now I’m wondering if it might actually help me get pregnant, because I would be less stressed, and isn’t that what they always tell you to be.

[Nevergiveup]

Oh hunni you are really going through it atm… what’s that saying it never rains but it pours. I wish I could just give you a big hug, sounds like you really need it. This process is so tough on us physically, emotionally and mentally and we get battered with everything to the point we are drained and now you have to still be tough and hold it together for your husband and mil. I’m not surprised you feel like you do and going to the gp seems a very good idea. Have you told your husband you are going? Does he know how you feel or are you trying to not let on? I understand he wants to help with his mum and spend as much time with her but I bet he’ll want to help you too. Is there anyone that can keep you company in an evening if hubby is staying over?
Please remember that you can always chat on here! I wish I could do more even if it’s just listening to you. Let us know how you get on.
I know gps are constantly trying to push getting out in the fresh air for a walk and meeting people to help with mental health but it’s not that easy sometimes, especially if you don’t have many people you can talk to I find. I have lots of people I can make small talk with like parents at pick up time etc but I don’t have anyone to actually ‘talk’ to if you know what I mean.
They do say stress doesn’t help but everyone has some stress. Are you getting enough sleep or is all this impacting? Maybe that’s the level of stress they want you to avoid!?!?
Do you live far from the care Nottingham clinic? We live in Derby x

[Nevergiveup]

Lorelai sorry about your result, it sucks doesn’t it when you get that negative. Feels like someone squeezed your heart. It’s good you have come to terms with it and have a review booked.
I’ve always had to have the withdrawal bleed and a proper period before starting again as a minimum.
I’m currently on my first proper period after so was told in my review to contact care and access fertility to pay and sort consent forms and arrange medication.
We have messaged care to ask how long it takes to sort consent forms and arrange meds and each time they respond they are only giving part of a response or something not useful at all so I’m currently at the banging my head against a brick wall stage. I don’t want to order meds now and have them just sitting in the fridge for 5-6 weeks as it takes up a fair amount of space especially when I have a weekly shop for 4 of us and I’m also thinking long term that if I’m having to do a 5th cycle I want to be able to use any spare medication from my 4th cycle rather than dates be up as it’s all so expensive.
Are you wanting to do another cycle? Did you say you have frozen embryos left? X

[Stephlm]

Hi ladies,

So sorry to hear your struggles, I know how hard this journey is and whilst at the moment things are going well for us, I know all too well how quickly that can change.

We had a positive scan yesterday and baby was doing well.

I’m not sure my presence in this group is right at the moment and I’m going to take a step away.

Please, if I can give any advice it’s not to give up and to keep hope. It’s taken me three rounds of egg collection, a failed implantation, two missed miscarriages and a failed thaw to get to this point. I’m on tenter hooks that we’ll miscarry again but I’m hoping our PGT-A testing and changed protocol has got this one right for us

I’ll be thinking of you all and sending so much love and positive vibes. I’ll keep checking in!
Xxx

[AmericanGirl]

Thanks for your support, Nevergiveup. I told my husband how I was feeling a few days ago and told him to was thinking of seeing the GP which he thought was a good idea, because my anxiety isn’t new. He was home Friday night and we decided I would sleep over his mums with him last night so I’m feeling much better at the moment. Just being with him is helpful. I shouldn’t rely learn to cope independently though. By the way, we’re in Derbyshire!

Steph, best of luck to you! I hope this one sticks for good!