Thinking of adoption

Life after IVF? What other options are available?

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Pash
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Jan 14, 2015 10:04 am
Location: Nottinghamshire

Thinking of adoption

Well it's been ten years since I've been on the BB, I've been through the ivf process 5 times , one bio chem, last was a bfp no heart beat was found at the scan. Decided not to continue. Relationship broke down. I've now been with my husband for seven years , Dh has three children 18,14,12. Although I love my step children I still would like someone to call me mum.
So we have decided to look into adoption.
Contacted our La and our welcome pack has come today.
I'm now 43 Dh 42
LottieH
Posts: 788
Joined: Mon Mar 23, 2009 9:37 pm

Hi Hun,
Welcome to the next rollercoaster you will go on in pursuit of becoming a mummy :-)
The best book I can recommend at the stage you are at is An Adoption Diary by Maria James. It's a thin book but a great example of the assessment process and available through most libraries. Although most LA's would like you both to do lots of reading, I read the Vera Farlberg book on Mels list and needed a few weeks to digest it before starting the process as it was a bit heavy going.
My hubby and I were approved as adopters 6 months ago and are waiting to be matched, our journey and those of others is on this board too so feel free to have a read.
Good luck! :-)
Pash
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Jan 14, 2015 10:04 am
Location: Nottinghamshire

Hi little thankyou for your message, had our first visit from our la. My Dh isn't sure. I think maybe our adoption journey has ended before its begun. He don't think we will be excepted and has a few reservations. Guess some of us aren't ment to be a full time mum. X
LottieH
Posts: 788
Joined: Mon Mar 23, 2009 9:37 pm

Hi Pash,
I hope a week or so on DH is feeling more positive about it but if you think you will come to resent his not even looking at it then it's worth having a quiet, well thought discussion about it and if you haven't already then read the adoption diary so you understand the assessment process because there is a stage 1 which you can decide to have a break after or pull out of altogether. You get to do a single day course (well we did) and a bit of work with a social worker who will talk through any concerns you have so will both be more informed if you decide to carry on to the next more intense part.
I wish you well with whatever you decide,
Lx
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